Gotta laugh to keep from crying :

Andy’s Backpacking Glossary:

Cloudburst: What starts approximately 5 minutes before you unroll your tent. (Note: normally these will last at least until you are completely soaked, and will cease about 1 ½ minutes after you finish setting up the tent.)

Lake: What forms underneath and around your tent as you are setting it up.

Perfect Campsite: The ideological pinnacle of outdoor recreation. A place shrouded in myth, with all the primitive allure of the famed Fountain of Youth. The drive to find said campsite is inevitably enough to drive a man to pass up perfectly good campsites, in search of the perfect campsite, until the Cloudburst forces him to accept a completely mediocre campsite.

Bedrock: What is directly beneath wherever you want to drive that stake. You are not the first to bend three stakes in a row, stubbornly thinking the next one will surely break through, whilst giving the steak the savage beating of the century with whatever hard object appears at hand.